A Prisoner Of Fear
Mood:  don't ask
Now Playing: Racine No1- Racine
Topic: Persecution.

Evening,

I am under siege, a prisoner in my own home! Someone or something has knocked on my front door twice this evening. I am not expecting anyone, not even debt collectors. There is no force on earth that would induce me to open the door to anyone I wasn't expecting. The last time I did it my mother was there, large as life and twice as terrifying. The time before that it was Mormons. This time it could be a murderer!

I am constructed in such a way that means I cannot have company unexpectedly. Socialising takes a lot out of me. I need to know someone for at least a year before I lose the feeling that I'm being judged. It's not my fault, years of people gawping at me wearing an expression of total incredulity saying 'why?' to some innocuous opinion I have expressed have taken their toll. I am truly sorry I am not the same as everyone else.

I'm afraid I have nothing to report. No exciting plans for the weekend. Nothing. I'm going to Amsterdam for three days in September but until then the days stretch out ahead of me emptily.


Cheerio