Celebrity Soft Porn Shite
Mood:  caffeinated
Now Playing: Life Goes On- Racine
Topic: The Idiots.


Evening,

I note that pointless aristocrat Isabella Hervey is to be the face of Playboy U.K. Excuse me whilst I stifle the largest of yawns. Why in the name of God do celebrities never do real porn?

The truth is I'm fucking fed up with tits. To be topical I will use Isabella Hervey as an example. She insists that her Playboy pictures will be 'tasteful'. For heavens sake she is a fairly average looking woman who has made the best of what she's got, not a raving beauty whose 'tasteful' tits are going to send us into a frenzy. Now just imagine if she'd announced she was going to do a double penetration or fuck a dwarf or bukkake. That would at least have some curiosity value. I wouldn't admit it in front my parents or anything but I'd want a look.

People face facts this isn't the 1950's! A girl in a sweater isn't that exciting anymore. Like one of De Sades jaded aristocrats I require novelty and extravagant displays of debauchery.

Real hardcore celebrity porn would be a great thing. Knowing what sheep they all are once one does it they'll all be at it. Posh Spice takes it up the arse live in Parky ably assisted by a dildo brandishing Rebecca Loos! I'd watch, so would you. It would be an all time ratings smash. I had high hopes for Jordan until she got fed up as being regarded as a vacuous slapper called Jordan and made the remarkable career leap of being 'taken seriously' as a vacuous slapper called Katie Price.

That's all for just now.


Cheerio.