My Empire of Dirt.
Mood:  down
Now Playing: Hurt-Johnny Cash
Topic: My Bank Holiday


It's been a funny sort of day and I feel quite melancholy for some reason. No-one put their arms around me and said they loved me and only me, but no-one put me in a car and drove me to a woollen mill, so I can't really complain.

I took a walk along to the St Mungo Museum on Castle St and spent an hour swishing about in there. My favourite exhibit is the statue of the Hindu deity Shiva dancing on the demon of ignorance (similar version pictured). Every time I see it (I have a miniature version in my hall) I am seized by the urge to shout 'dance harder Shiva'.

I then strolled along to Tesco for some shopping. The reduced bit was very disappointing all they had reduced was chicken which I don't eat and 'Orange Sensations'. I gave the Orange Sensations a miss as I don't really want to eat something that sounds like a hardline protestant cabaret band.

I then took a walk over to the newly refitted Top Shop. Oh. My. God. I was greeted by the sight of a sinister female hybrid of Trinny and Susannah and Nathan Barley holding three blushing teenage girls dressed like loons hostage in the middle of the shop. As I continued to stare in horror and disbelief it became apparent that the sinister Barley / Trinny and Susannah creature was a 'fashion expert' and had given the teenage victims a makeover. As ever I asked myself why everyone was acting like this was normal? I, as ever failed to come up with an answer. When the frankly mental 'fashion expert' described one of the girls as 'really rockin the safari look yeah'I took the cowards way out and fled.

Somewhere in Glasgow three shell-shocked teenage girls are wandering around muttering 'bright lights' 'crazy woman' 'took our clothes' 'Guantanamo Bay'and 'only looking' . Let's hope they pull through.

So todays lesson is that there is a significant and important difference between a style expert and a fashion expert. Only one will make you rock the safari look.

Other than that little to report, so until there is-cheerio.