I Would Not Fuck These With Yours!
Mood:  caffeinated
Now Playing: Trash- New York Dolls
Topic: Alone, Alone, Alone


Evening,

There I was eating my cherries and swishing about the net when I thought I'd visit Dr Feelgood to cheer myself up. As ever I was seized with the urge to steal and like a big magpie half inched this thing. It a a celebrity love match thing that pairs you up with a selection of alleged celebrities based of your date of birth. I am most unimpressed with my selection.

Apparently the women I'm most compatible with are
Annamarie Thomas (who?), the improbably named 'Lark Voorhies (who?), Fergie (mercifully not the Duchess of York, but the singer), Kimberly Williams and Marit Van Bohemen (pictured). I must confess I have never heard of Marit but a quick Google search reveals that she is a 'TV babe'. To be frank she looks like the best out a bad lot but being a 'TV babe' is probably a big pain in the arse. The men are even worse. Marshall Faulk (who?), Ole Gunnar Solskjaer (12 year old), Christian Coulson (some connection to fucking Harry Potter), Christian Slater (no! no! no!) and Edward Norton.

For fucks sake I took up bisexuality to expand my choice and I'm expected to get excited by this rubbish. I have chosen Ed Norton because I have heard of him and I have seen him in two films. I should point out that I know it's only a daft test and I'm not expected to actually fuck any of the celebrities involved, I just felt that having shared the news with you I should express a preference.

To add insult to injury the lying test of Satan reckons I'm only 85% compatible with my real life boyfriend. What piffle! My boyfriend is the fucking best and the person I have known longest without wanting to punch.

I'm going now, I'm too distressed to carry on.


Cheerio